heather & I

walked into the party with some excitement- it is very well organized party, alot more effort than those crappy bu parties. so i cruised around and met couple people. one stood out immediately. wow it's been awhile for a girl who i found beautiful yet bold. everything she wore was so plain, from the typical furry winter shoes to black shirt. she might be it. i started from somewhere else and slowly worked toward her. she didn't even seem like she saw me coming- she continued looking at someone or something. can't figure out what. the party had only handful of boys- at that point i wasn't so worried. i went on drinking a terrible wine from a big red cup. time passed and i got to talk to her. she was plain as i thought, but i still couldn't get a full grasp of her. i was confused. she ripped my lesson from the past, and made return to small middle school boy. I whispered to her and i was timid. i couldn't find a smoother way to talk to her, and i ended up just telling her that i find her attractive and i like her- which was a big turn off apparently. she backed off, and showed me what she was focused on from the beginning- the other boy from this handful group. it torn my self-esteem once again, i felt like i was back in middle school-- confused and unintelligent.  this other guy had a shabby beard and curly hair, for that day he had more to offer than i did. 

black- sitting around just cruising. i am so bothered by some of these lesbian girls. this party looks interesting to stick around. mind as well! it has couple cute boys in it. im gonna start slow though- start with some wines and initiate the social agenda. party went on, and nothing interesting was happening, and this asian kid bluntly showed me that he was interested in me. poor boy- he should've learned more from his yrs in school. he was cute, but not cute enough. he didn't look to have much. that's enough about that boy, i saw a cuter boy- he doesn't go around and try to impress people. i like this boy better, here it goes.